Chapter 104
The silence pressed down like a heavy force as we walked side by side toward the woods behind my estate.
If she feared, she refused to show it. Her steps were sure, certain. There was no trepidation in her stride as she walked beside me, letting me lead the way.
Every time I was graced with a glimpse of her, her face was a mask of cold neutrality that chilled me more than ice ever could.
Her mouth set in a hard line—too out of place on her soft features—and I knew I was to blame.
Sleep had evaded me since I’d last heard her voice. Food offered no warmth or savor.
The rut had quieted to a dull roar, but only because my body had redirected all its resources toward simply functioning in her proximity without shattering completely.
She didn’t look at me.
Hadn’t looked at me—really looked—since that morning in the kitchen.
I was losing my mind, clawing at my slipping sanity and knowing that there was only one thing—one person that could alleviate my suffering.
Only her.
And I couldn’t have her.
My bionic hand flexed—like a reminder of how much little time I had left.
“The training today will be different,” I said, breaking the silence. My voice sounded foreign even to my own ears—rough, unused.
She didn’t respond. Didn’t even acknowledge I’d spoken.
Just kept walking, her face that terrible blank mask.
Say something, I wanted to beg. Yell at me. Curse me. Anything but this silence.
But I’d been the one to demand it.
Stop speaking.
And she’d listened.
Fuck, she’d listened so well it was killing me.
“We’re working on evasion,” I continued, desperate to fill the void even if she wouldn’t. “Your opponent in the Luna Duel won’t fight fair. They’ll use the environment. Try to trap you. Corner you p>
Still nothing.
We reached the clearing—deep enough in the woods that no one would hear. No one would interrupt.
I turned to face her finally, and the full force of her emptiness hit me.
Those eyes that used to spark gold when she was amused. That used to narrow in that particular way when she was working through a problem. That used to look at me with something that might have been the beginning of—
Gone.
All of it gone.
Replaced by nothing.
“Lilith p>
“What are the parameters?” Her voice was flat. Professional. Like I was a stranger giving instructions, not the male who’d held her while she cried. Who’d danced with her. Who’d whispered moya against her skin.
I forced myself to focus. To be what she needed right now—a trainer, not the male who was falling apart at the seams.
“You run,” I said. “I hunt. You have a ten-minute head start. If you can evade me for an hour, you win p>
“And if you catch me p>
The question hung in the air, loaded with implications neither of us acknowledged.
“Then we work on what went wrong. Discuss strategy. Try again p>
She nodded once. Curt. Efficient.
Then turned and started stretching, preparing herself with mechanical precision.
No banter. No questions. No spark of challenge or curiosity.
Just cold compliance.
I watched her, something cracking in my chest with each silent moment.
This is what you wanted, I reminded myself. Distance. Safety. Protection.
But standing here, watching her prepare to run from me like I was just another threat she needed to survive—
I’d never felt more monstrous.
“Before we start,” I said, the words coming out rougher than intended. “We need to talk. Establish parameters p>
She paused mid-stretch, straightening slowly. Her expression didn’t change—still that terrible, empty mask.
“This exercise—” I forced myself to continue. “It requires trust. If things get too intense, if the chase becomes—” I stopped, jaw clenching. “I need to know you understand what could happen. That you can signal if p>
“There doesn’t need to be trust between us p>
The words hit like a physical blow.
I stared at her, something cold and sharp lodging in my chest.
“Lilith p>
“This was a tentative alliance to begin with,” she continued, her voice flat, matter-of-fact. “There’s no reason to pretend it’s anything more than it is. That only confuses the bond further p>
Confuses the bond.
As if that’s all this was. All we were.
Biology. Compulsion. Confusion.
“I’ll do my part,” she said, turning away from me to continue stretching. “I’ll run. You’ll chase. That’s the exercise. That’s all it needs to be p>
Something inside me cracked.
Then shattered.
The rut—dormant, controlled, carefully leashed—roared to life with a violence that stole my breath.
My hand went to my tie, yanking it loose with enough force that the fabric burned against my skin. The other hand—already shifting, claws extending—drove through my hair, destroying hours of careful control.
Tentative alliance.
All it needs to be.
Nothing more.
She’d just told me I meant nothing. That the bond meant nothing. That everything—the dance, the bite, the way she’d held me that night—meant nothing.
And the beast inside me—the one I’d been fighting for weeks, the one I’d brutalized myself to contain—finally broke free.
“Fine,” I said, my voice no longer my own. Rougher. Lower. Barely human.
She turned at the change in my tone, eyes widening slightly—the first real emotion I’d seen from her in days.
I took a step toward her.
She stepped back instinctively.
Good.
She should run.
“No trust,” I said, taking another step. “No pretense. Just the chase p>
My eyes were changing—I could feel it. The pale blue bleeding to almost white as Zver surged forward, no longer content to watch from the shadows.
“But understand this, Lilith p>
The way her name rolled off my tongue—possessive, hungry, dark—made her breath catch. I heard it. Smelled the spike of fear beneath her carefully maintained neutrality.
“When I catch you—” Another step. She was backed against a tree now, nowhere left to retreat. “—and I will catch you p>
I leaned down, close enough that my breath stirred the curls at her temple. Close enough to feel the rapid flutter of her pulse.
“—I won’t be holding back p>
I would not be making her speak, I would be making her scream.
She swallowed hard, and I watched the movement of her throat with predatory focus.
“I don’t—” she started.
“Run p>
The word came out part growl, part command.
“Vladimir p>
“Run p>
This time, she listened.
She bolted.
Shifting mid-sprint, her clothes shredding as Kaia took over, powerful limbs eating up ground as she disappeared into the trees.
I stood there in the clearing, watching her go.
Counting.
One.
My tie hit the ground.
Two.
My jacket followed.
Three.
Claws fully extended now, tearing through expensive fabric like paper.
Four.
The rut was singing, drowning out everything else. Every rational thought. Every carefully constructed reason why I needed to maintain control.
Five.
She’d said it herself.
Tentative alliance.
Nothing more.
Six.
So I’d give her exactly what she asked for.
Seven.
No pretense.
Eight.
No restraint.
Nine.
Just the hunt.
Ten.
“Moya,” I whispered to the empty clearing, my voice barely recognizable. “Forgive me p>