Chapter 485
485
Irvin knew there was no longer any possibility between us, and he kept telling himself to let go and wish me happiness. Even so, he also knew how deeply I had loved him.
He knew that even though I was now engaged to William and trying to start a new life, my heart probably hadn’t completely let go of him.
He believed that a part of me still held onto him, that I wasn’t truly ready to begin a new relationship . That belief made watching me with William painful but not unbearable, not to the point of utter despair.
What he never saw coming was that I hadn’t just moved on with William, but we had already had a physical relationship. I was even pregnant.
That shattered him.
It wasn’t just heartbreak anymore. It was devastation–something he couldn’t even begin to handle.
The blow was too much. No matter how hard he tried to hold it together, he simply couldn’t. His tall, strong frame collapsed with a heavy thud.
Right before our eyes, this man who had always seemed so solid, so unshakable, crumbled as if all the life had been drained from him.
The pain hit him so hard, it was unbearable–so deep it felt worse than death.
Watching him fall like that, my heart ached uncontrollably. The kind of pain that was buried deep and refused to stay quiet.
However, I didn’t move. I just stood there and looked down at him , cold and detached.
We had come too far, and there was no going back. The only way forward was through complete release. Only by truly letting go could either of us be reborn.
Irvin needed to let go of me the way I had let go of him. It was the only way he could begin again and find his own happiness.
No matter what happened between us, I never hated or wanted him to suffer. What I wanted was for him to find his own version of peace and joy.
I wanted him to be fine.
His expression was indescribable when he met my cold and distant eyes.
In the past, in a moment like this, he would look at me with those soft, pleading eyes, like a heartbroken puppy begging not to be left behind. Those eyes used to melt me.
But not this time. Maybe he knew that look wouldn’t work anymore. Or perhaps he finally understood it was truly over.
He just stared at me quietly. And that gaze, stripped of hope, was even harder to face.
I couldn’t look at him any longer, so I looked away and was ready to leave.
But just as I turned, Irvin pushed himself up against the wall and stood, forcing a weak, awkward smile.
1/2
485
+25 BONUS
“I’ve been so busy lately, I keep forgetting to eat. It’s just low blood sugar, that’s all,” he said, as if trying to play it off. “Sorry you had to see that.”
Once upon a time, we had been the closest people in the world. And now, he was talking to me like a distant acquaintance.
Looking at him, I didn’t even know how to respond.
But before I could say anything, he continued, “Congratulations on becoming a mother. William must be a great man since you were able to open your heart to him so quickly. I’m sure you two will be very happy together.
The moment Irvin collapsed earlier, the thought of all the times we had tried so hard to have a child flashed through his mind.
But it never worked out. Maybe that was fate’s way of showing us, even back then, that we weren’t meant to
last.
And then he remembered how we lost our first child because of him. Suddenly, he didn’t even feel like he had the right to grieve.
He had no right to hurt this much, to hope for more, and to ask for anything.
He needed to make the most of the time he had left, use whatever strength he had left to bring me happiness, and help create a better life for me.
That thought and purpose brought a flicker of life back into him. It gave him the strength to stand again.
I looked at him for a moment. Then I smiled softly. “Thank you.”