Chapter 803
“I know,” Calliope said, glancing at Silas. “I just feel so bad for them, you know? It took them so much to finally be together, and now… it all ended so quickly. Lance must be hurting so much p>
“He can’t bear to say goodbye to Hudson,” Silas replied softly. “It’s always the ones left behind who suffer most p>
Silas’s voice trembled a little. He looked up at Calliope. “He’ll get through it. Someday, maybe decades from now, they’ll meet again. This is just a temporary goodbye p>
Calliope wiped her tears and tried to pull herself together. She started taking care of all the things that needed to be handled.
Lance, for his part, managed to keep it together. After spending a long time with Hudson, and with everyone’s help, he finally let them take Hudson to the funeral home.
They called everyone who needed to know. People started to show up, one after another.
Hudson never had a huge circle of friends, but he’d made sure everything was in place to make things easier for Lance.
Calliope and Silas stayed by Lance’s side, helping however they could.
Lance barely left Hudson’s side, just sitting there and staring at him. He looked calm on the surface, but it was the kind of calm that comes from being completely shattered inside.
Hudson had told him it was okay to be sad for a few days.
But is grief ever something you can just switch off?
Calliope didn’t know how to comfort Lance. She was mourning, too. They’d both been her friends for years. One of them was gone now, and it hurt. All she could do was sit next to Lance, listening to him ramble on and on about all the memories he’d shared with Hudson.
He’d start laughing at some story, then, halfway through, would break down in tears.
People kept coming to pay their respects.
Lance didn’t want to talk to anyone, so Silas took care of it all, handling everything with quiet grace. People came and went, but with Silas there, Calliope and Lance didn’t have to worry about anything. They kept their silent vigil by Hudson’s side. They stayed up all night, burning candles and sharing stories, a bit like a wake with coffee and pie, the way Hudson would’ve wanted.
Lance didn’t really cry, not at first.
It wasn’t until the next day, when it was time for the cremation, that something inside him just snapped. He screamed and fought and sobbed so hard nobody could hold him back.
“You promised you’d stay with me forever p>
“Hudson, you said you’d take care of me for the rest of our lives. How can you just leave p>
“How am I supposed to go on by myself? I can’t do this alone p>
“Hudson p>
“Come back to me! Please, just come back p>
“I don’t want to let you go, I don’t want to burn what’s left. I can’t stand not having you here p>
“Why couldn’t it have been me? Do you know how scared I am? I’m terrified without you. If only it had been me instead I wouldn’t even know what I’m missing, right?” s
“You always worried about me. Why couldn’t you have stayed? Why couldn’t you have let me go instead p>
Lance’s grief poured out in wild, desperate sobs.
Calliope stayed close, holding his
bet
arm, not saying a word. She let him cry, let him scream let him pour everything out. s
He cried for a long, long time.
Finally, she spoke, her voice soft but firm. ce, that’s enough. Hudson
you to be good, remember?
It’s time for him to gets times up p>
s
Lance’s cries faded to quiet whimpers. He slumped to the ground, watching as Hudson was taken away.
Calliope sat beside him, holding his hand.
Silas was a short distance away, handling the last of the arrangements.
At the burial, Lance didn’t cry anymore. He forced himself to hold back the tears.
“You told me not to cry for too long, that it’d make me look awful. So I’m not going to cry anymore p>
“Hudson, wait for me, okay? I promise I’ll find you someday p>
“Don’t you dare run off with anyone else. You have to wait just for me p>
Lance sat by Hudson’s headstone, leaning against it like he was leaning into his arms one last time.