Chapter 305
305
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Adolescence was already a time when emotions are most unstable making it easy to act impulsively and engage in risky behaviors. Being treated that way by my own family, I walked into the ocean, one step at a time.
I wanted to die .
I wanted them to regret, to suffer, to have everyone condemn them for killing their own daughter over an adopted one.
I was so foolish back then, thinking I could punish them with my death. I completely forgot that they needed to actually care about me to feel remorse and pain for losing me. If they didn’t care it wouldn’t matter if I died a thousand times.
Using my own death to punish others is the most foolish thing in the world. I came to that realization when I was on the brink of
death.
I struggled, trying to make my way back to shore, desperate to survive. But then, a huge wave dragged me under, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stand up.
I didn’t know how to swim back then.
Just when I thought I was going to die, a tall young man dove in beside me. Like an angel from the heavens, he pulled me back from the edge of death.
When I was sent to the hospital, they called my parents to sign the consent forms , but they were too busy celebrating my brother’s birthday and making Julianne happy.
So, he was the one who signed for me.
After I woke up and told him why I tried to kill myself, he comforted me, telling me it was never my fault if others didn’t like me. That I was precious and unique, and it was their loss to not like me.
He also said that if I didn’t like the name my parents gave me, I could change it when I became an adult. There was no need to hurt myself over that.
He told me that my death wouldn’t punish anyone. It would only make those who didn’t like me happier. If I didn’t want to be treated that way by my parents, I needed to become stronger.
He also bought me a bouquet of sunflowers, wishing that my life would be like a sunflower, full of light and passion.
The young Irvin was truly kind, handsome, sincere, and warm.
His words were my lifeline, something I could hold onto to keep from drowning. I no longer wanted to die. Instead, I wanted to become strong, like what he said.
Even the name I chose for myself, Emilia, was a tribute to what he told me that day. I was unique and precious, and the name will remind me to strive, to grow, and to never forget that I mattered.
Not only did he save my life , but he also gave me a new one spiritually.
Later when we met again in university , he didn’t recognize me , the teenager he had saved so casually. But I recognized him the moment I saw him.
When he confessed his feelings for me , I was excited and overjoyed
But I didn’t accept him. I wasn’t sure if my feelings for him were romantic or just gratitude for saving my life. I didn’t want to repay his kindness with a love that wasn’t genuine.
It took me an entire year to realize that I truly had feelings for him . It wasn’t just gratitude.
After we finally got together, I brought up the time when he had saved me, and he was so happy that he had done that. He believed that we were simply meant to be.
But later , because of what Julianne had said, he started to think that our so–called destiny had been carefully schemed by me.
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That it was all just my manipulation.
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Seeing the tears well up in my eyes and stream down my face, Irvin panicked. He wanted to wipe them away, but he couldn’t stand up no matter what. He couldn’t move.
He was so frustrated that he wanted to hit his useless legs.
Watching how anxious and genuine he was, I saw how he used to b
He used to be so good to me. We used to be so in love. And yet, we had ended up like this.
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