Chapter 131
Chapter 131
Dierdra’s eyes flashed in the darkness.
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“Oh, you would never hurt me, I’m sure!” she simpered, leaning towards me and thrusting her breasts towards my face in her lowcut nightgown, “You are so kind to consider it, but I assure you that I want this …” Once more her hands roamed across my body and under my shirt, across the broad planes of my chest, “I want you p>
“I want you too,” I murmured, even as I stilled her hands and pulled back, “but you need your rest, and I would truly be a monster if I took advantage of you in this state p>
“Aren’t you though?” Dierdra snapped, then, catching herself said quickly, “I mean, isn’t that what they call you p>
I froze, “What did you say p>
She tittered nervously, as though realizing she had fucked up, “Oh, I must have misunderstood. It was just something I heard in the village p>
“You heard them call me a monster,” I repeated carefully. My heartbeat was rushing in my ears.
“I didn’t mean to offend!” Dierdra looked genuinely afraid now, “I assumed it was because you are so powerful p>
She reached for me, but I turned away from her grasping hands and raised my arm to block her
embraces.
“The villagers did not call me that because of my strength, or prowess as Alpha, or anything like that,” I said stiffly.
“…oh.” Dierdra seemed at a loss for words.
She had started this, now she would get to see exactly what sort of wolf her mate truly was.
I turned towards her, letting my wolf shine through my eyes, yellow in the darkness. He was just as offended as I was. To have someone who was supposed to be our mate call us by a reminder of the
worst time in our lives…
“They call me a monster because I am one,” I said, with the emotionless tone I used when I was at my most merciless. The voice I used when I let the despair take over.
Dierdra stared at me, eyes wide.
“They call me that because I killed those I loved most,” I growled, “because no bonds of love or family could stop me. Because there is always the chance it will happen again p>
There, that was the true me. Now what would she do with it? Would my mate accept my horrible past?
I watched horror sweep over her face, saw her withdraw and slide across the bed away from me. A part
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Chapter 131
of me rejoiced in seeing her retreat.
Rejection was a familiar friend.
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There had only been one person who had ever listened to my painful memories and not run away. My heart twinged at the memory of Avery’s sympathetic, open face. The way she had embraced me.
When I was with her, I had felt whole.
No one had ever accepted me like that, before or since, so I shouldn’t have been surprised at seeing Dierdra’s expression shutter and her eyes seek the exits in the room in case I turned on her as well.
Her rejection was just another cut among many. Predictable. Disappointing.
Solitude would heal my wounds, at least superficially. I needed to be alone.
I let the mask of humanity slide back over my face, hiding the demon within my blood and the taint of his
sins.
“You should rest,” I said calmly, as though the conversation hadn’t derailed abruptly, “I will come to carry you down for breakfast. I’ll sleep in my office. You will sleep better if I’m not here p>
“Yes,” Dierdra agreed faintly, face pale as her eyes failed to meet mine, “I suppose I will p>
“Sweet dreams,” I said, closing the door softly behind me.
Ahead of me was Avery’s door. A minute before I had wanted solitude, so why did I now imagine knocking on that door and seeking her company?
After what I had just made her do, I was very unlikely to receive a warm welcome. She had said that she would never forgive me. I needed to make my peace with that.
I left the pack house and transformed into my wolf, prowling through the darkness that had been my only company for decades.
This was what I deserved. What a monster deserved.
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