Chapter 424
I would love nothing more than for her to be a constant in my life again, but I didn’t know how to get back to the way we were before this all blew up in our faces. “I’ll never hate her Carter, but I don’t know how to get back to where we were. So much has changed, and I want to fix it, but I don’t know how p>
“Small steps bear like dinner tomorrow p>
“Yeah, you’re right small steps p>
It could only go up from here, right?
“How are you doing anyway?”. He asked.
“I got into college so there’s that p>
“Yeah?”. He grinned.
I nodded. “No more sitting around staring at the same four walls all day”. I was excited about this. It was the start of something new and I was ready for it. “How many days do you go there p>
“Monday through to Wednesday and then a half day on a Thursday so I’ll be there the majority of the week p>
“Good bear that’s good. Let me guess you’re majoring in English literature p>
A laugh fell from my lips. “I’m even thinking about doing a night class as well”. On what yet I wasn’t sure I just wanted to keep busy and secure a degree or two.
I needed purpose and something to work towards and it’s not like I had a job to go to. Apparently, I didn’t need to work or make money.
A sigh fell from my lips. I knew Jake would want nothing more than for me to stay at home and do nothing but that wasn’t in my nature. I wasn’t ready to be a housewife just yet.
I was only 18. I had my whole life ahead of me to be a wife and a mom. This time now was for me, for us, to enjoy life and it being just me and him.
“Are you doing good?”. I asked.
“Always bear”. He smiled.
“I’m guessing you and Alanna sorted things out?”. I wasn’t sure if they were still a little rocky.
“She’s twisted as shit, but I just do what I’m told and get on with it. We’re fine though we’ll always sort through whatever life throws at us p>
“Twisted, never”. I grinned.
A laugh fell from his lips as he grabbed another slice of pizza. “Did you ever think your life would turn out this way p>
“What? Finding out I was a werewolf, the mate to an Alpha, moving to Texas or my relationship with gran p>
“Well, when you put it like that”. He grinned. “Life works in mysterious ways don’t you think p>
“Everything happens for a reason”. I spoke. “And no, I didn’t think this would have been my life but I’m glad it is. I’m happy now, more than I’ve ever been”. “Do you think she did it all for you?”. He asked.
“Gran?”. I frowned.
He nodded.
I shrugged. “Honestly, I think she moved us out here for George and the rest just happened. I don’t believe she knew I was Jake’s mate I mean how could she?”. “Maybe she had a hunch p>
“Oh, come on”. I rolled my eyes. “Don’t get me wrong I don’t believe her intentions were bad just the way she went about it p>
“I get that”. He nodded. “And I do think she realises now that she went about it all the wrong way. I think she needs forgiveness, for you to forgive her and for the both of you to move on p>
She didn’t need my forgiveness. She may have done some shitty things but apparently it was all for my benefit. Pushing me to move in with Jake, selling the house, skipping town and leaving nothing but a note. The more I think about it the shittier it sounds.
“Everything happens for a reason though, right p>
“You really believe that?”. He asked.
“I do p>
“Do you want to forgive her p>
“I want to move on and be done with this whole thing. I’m sick to death of it always playing in the back of my mind. And if I’m being really honest here whether she’s in my life or not nothing is going to change. She’ll go on with her life and I’ll go on with mine p>
“Wow, bear. That’s very mature but don’t you think she deserves to be in your life p>
“What you getting at Carter p>
“Don’t you miss her being here p>
I did at the start. I cried for what felt like weeks and then it stopped. I picked myself up, dusted myself off and continued with life. I think I reacted the way I did because it had always just been the two of us but that was no longer the case. I had Jake, I was supported by his family and as the weeks went by, I no longer felt the need to be hurt by what she did.
“Of course I miss her”. I sighed. “But I learned to live and get by without her p>
“I get that, but you can’t be mad at me for wanting my family to be together again p>
“I’m not mad Carter, I just wish it was all put behind us. I’m so done with talking about it p>
“Say no more. I’m going to head home but I’ll see you tomorrow p>
“Are you sure you’re, okay?”. I asked getting to my feet so I could walk him out.
“Always bear I’ll catch you later p>
Okay then.
I made sure to lock the door after he left. Something was off with him and of course he didn’t want to talk about it. The way he came at me with the whole gran situation was weird.
Carter was always easy going. He went with the flow, a people pleaser if you wish but something triggered him to involved himself in all of this. But like he said maybe he just wants his family together.
But I wasn’t sure I fully believed that.
I moved the pizza box into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water before heading upstairs. Like always I switched on the tv before getting into bed. Closing my eyes I pulled the cover up and around my neck and fell asleep to the background noise coming from the tv.